Related Posts:

Part 1: Helping Your Clients Through The Change Curve.

In Part 1 of this series, I lifted the veil a bit on a model my colleauges and I in the change management consulting biz used during a “previous life” to explain to client managers about the dynamics of managing change.

We used a diagram that looked like the one below to set expectations about employee motivations and what our clients, the managers, were likely to encounter as they navigated a big corporate change program like a large technology implementation, a merger or, say, a mass layoff.

Despite the diagram above telling only part of the story I think it’s a good diagram. (I’ll share the dynamics of positively perceived change in the next post on this series).

If the events surrounding a recent death in my family tree can be used as a gauge, I think the curve above has been fairly accurate in tracing the sequence of Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance that I saw while interacting with my relatives during our recent sad event. (The original 1969 model, based on a study on Death and Dying had only 5 stages.  Two additional stages of Immobilization and Testing were added in the heydey of corporate re-engineering in an attempt to adapt the model for a business context. )

Managing Buyer’s and Seller’s Remorse.

The model actually served me well when helping corporate managers develop communication plans, training programs and coaching programs for their employees. As it turns out, it also served me well when I used to manage client expectations in residential real estate transactions.

If you’ve heard the term “buyer’s remorse” (or “seller’s remorse”) then you can probably find the place on the graph where your client first expresses language representing remorse and then trace it on through the rest of the curve…

“(Buyer.) I hope I didn’t pay too much… I think I paid too much. (Denial.) Damn! I shoulda asked for the stereo speakers for what I paid. (Anger.) Do you think we can still get a concession? (Bargaining.) We shoulda got the speakers. (Brood… brood… a form of depression.) Well, it’s mine now. And, we do love that back deck. (Testing.   As in, testing the idea of ‘what if it were to work out?’) I can see some great barbecues and pool parties there… (Acceptance.)”

Or,

“(Seller.) I can’t believe they’re asking for those repairs! No! We listed it as being sold in ‘as-is’ condition. (Denial.) What part of ‘as-is’ does the buyer not understand? (Anger.) Ahh, hell, let’s find out what it’s gonna cost and then we’ll see… Darn buyer wants everything, they’re already gettin’ the granite tops and storm windows that I put in just last year… I shoulda asked for a higher price had I known they were gonna be this way about it (Depression)…Well, I guess $300 in repairs isn’t the end of the world. I s’pose it is a safety issue anyway. Besides, they did agree to a shorter escrow period. (Testing. Again, in the sense of ‘testig’ the idea of a workable solution.) Ahh, heck, let’s just do it and get on with it…! (Acceptance.)”

The key thing is to exercise your ability to recognize language and demeanor that imply a correlation to each of the different stages. By recognizing them, you’ll have a leg up in responding with appropriate communications and support to help your client navigate through the transaction.

One key learning about this curve I learned early on is that, the model is most helpful when you can recognize when certain support programs are most effective. But get this, it’s also very helpful in suggesting when certain support programs are least effective.

For example, reminding the seller above that the buyer reciprocated by agreeing to a short escrow would not likely be received too clearly by the seller while he’s in the throes of cursing about the repairs. But, consider the outcome of waiting until you start hearing him use language along the lines of “I suppose it’s a safety issue…” Then, with a sagelike head-nod you can be Johnny-on-the-spot with acknowledgement of his realization while adding the point about buyer reciprocation. While you’re at it, take that moment–and not any earlier than that moment–to remind your seller about the original reasons for selling the property to begin with.

Everybody gets mad.

Another interesting aside worth mentioning is my experience that, with the change curve, there’s the subtle implication that each stage is important in its own right to successfully navigate the whole transaction.

That is, for a negatively perceived change, what’s implied is that anger is a necessary stage to traverse on the client’s way to acceptance. I say that because we all often try to avoid the client getting mad at us. But the fact is, you can’t get to Acceptance without first going through Anger (and Bargaining, Depression and Testing, for that matter). But, just because the client has to experience anger in some form (if even moderately), doesn’t mean he/she has to express it at you. It only has be expressed in some way…

Gawd, this whole thing is really an interesting dynamic. One that has many avenues we can explore…unfortunately, more avenues than we have space in this blog. So, let’s make this an on-going dialog.

Feel free to post your observations and/or questions in the comments below. I’ll chime in with answers or add’l information as appropriate. In the meantime, I can also offer an excellent book if this is a topic you think you’d want to explore further.

An excellent text by Daryl Connor titled, Managing at the Speed of Change has long been on my suggested reading list. Check it out.

Keep in mind negative vs. positive.

Now, having said all the above, I’ll remind you that this is only part of the story. The iceberg tip above described the dynamics of change when it is perceived as negative. As it turns out, the curve for positively perceived change carries different dynamics.

I’ll describe my experiences about that in Part 3 of this series. Until then, I wish you success and a happy holiday.

Related Posts:

Part 1: Helping Your Clients Through The Change Curve.

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